I've been out of town on vacation for two weeks, with little access to tv. Let's see if Amazon Prime has gotten any new terrible selections.
Translated: Paul, who may or may not be the Apostle Paul, finds himself zapped from ancient Rome to the 21st century, where he hooks up with some slackers (whom, I assume, speak Latin) and observes contemporary Christianity. Doubtless he is qiute critical.
Found: What's with the one-word titles? Amazon Prime is getting as bad as Netflix. A "deputy sheriff" tries to save a boy (Joseph Stam) who grew up feral in the mountains. Isn't that the plot of Nell? Except there the man rescues a woman, and of course falls in love with her. Here Keith (Ryan Henderson) has a wife and three kids, and plans to adopt the boy. One of the kids is a teenager (Elijah Bullen), but he and the feral boy don't get along. Why am I getting so many fundamentalist movies? I'd rather watch heterosexuals falling in lo-ooo-ove.
The Wake of Light: Mary, who cares for her disabled father after his stroke, meets handsome stranger Cole (Matt Bush). Heterosexuals falling in lo-ooo-ove. But how does light have a "wake"?
My Pet Dinosaur: A teenage boy (Jordan Dulieu) adopts a baby dinosaur, which causes problems when it grows to full size. No plot synopsis on wikipedia, but a girl has second billing, so I'm sure hetero-love is in the air. (The picture is from the play Follow Me Home).
Griff the Invisible. A superhero movie. The trailer shows the superhero hugging a woman, interspliced by action shots. Ugh!
Address Unknown: "Ten years after their father's tragic deaths, two teenagers' tragic common bond leads to friendship and adventure." Enough tragedy for you? Wait -- are the two teenagers a butch girl and a femme girl? I guess not -- this movie is from 1997, and the "butch girl" is actually Kyle Howard with an androgynous haircut.
Stay Cool: An author returns to his home town to deliver a commencement address at the high school, and runs into drama. And meets a girl, of course.
Root of the Problem: A Southern family finds a real-life money tree, and learns what really matters in live. Let me guess: "Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, but store up for yourselves treasures in heaven." (Matthew 6:19).
One and the Same: A young woman is invited to "a facility," where she discovers an expermient "beyond space and time." Is she going to meet Cthulhu? No, she flashes back to her past life as a teenage boy named Robbie (Acoryé White, top photo ), who was murdered by an "ex-con." Now she wants to bring "her" murderer to justice.
I hate the myth that all ex-cons are violent. Most people are incarcerated for property and drug offenses. Plus this is the plot to The Reincarnation of Peter Proud (daughter falls in love with the reincarnation of her mother's murdered lover). But there's some gender fluidity, anyway.
Jaws 3: There was a third installment? The trailer shows a lot of women in weird costume performing surfing stunts, while someone yells "Shark! Shark!" No beefcake. Next!
Take Shelter. Curtis lives in a small town in Ohio with his wife, Samantha, and six-year old daughter. Next!
Divosi: Rick (Matt Steele) thinks he's a shoo-in for the lead in the high school musical, until the hunky basketball star (Timothy Brundidge) decides to audition. The trailer isn't clear: will the competition lead to the boys falling in love? But it's advertised with "Celebrate your Pride!", so I'm in.
Oh, I get it. The title of the movie is Divos!.
The Inheritance. A woman inherits a castle in Europe, and a "dark and disturbing secret" where "things are not what they seem." Did the person who wrote the synopsis copy from a book of cliches? A guy gets second billing, so doubtless there will be a cliched "love interest."
The Grotto. The plot synopsis is garbled, but I think it's about a young man (Arthur Vinciprova) accused of killing his wife and four other people in a cave, but he claims she was possessed by a demon. A novel twist on the "dead wife" cliche.
Indigenous. American tourists in Panama "have a very terrifying experience." No more details, no plot synopsis, but a photo of a fully clothed man and a boobitudinal woman looking scared. Next!
One out of 15, two if you include the gender-bending reincarnation. Not a bad score.
source http://everydayheterosexism.blogspot.com/2021/08/15-new-movies-on-amazon-prime-how-many.html